Gopher is one of the many ranks on CoU. Gopher is a rank for a person who does certain duties that officers don't want to do. Most of the jobs are for the chat. Gophers are considered to be one of the top non-officer members of certain groups. Their main jobs are grunt work.


Current Gophers



Everything that the officers don't want to do and grunt work.

Current GophersEdit

TheFallenOne - Fallen is the first Gopher for CoU. One day he mentioned that he was a Gopher for this club and Jason liked the idea of the Gopher rank.

Gopher DutiesEdit

Gophers have a set of duties that they must obey or they will be attacked by the ancient Gopher Gods.

  1. Obey the officers.
  2. Provide distraction when needed.
  3. If any, always help your Gopher allies.
  4. Only for chat, clear chat when asked.
  5. Kill anyone that the officers want dead.
  6. Rebuild HQ when it is destroyed.
  7. Keep dragons fed at all times.
  8. Help Zio and Dark with their pranks.
  9. Stop Zio and Dark's pranks.
  10. Make everyone lose the game.
  11. Be NPCs in Chatplays.
  12. Become a Human Shield.
  13. Kill one of the officers.
  14. Make equipment for the Cult.
  15. Sing a song.
  16. Kill Barky.
  17. Grunt Work.
  18. Get Jason his chew toy.
  19. Steal Giga's death ray.
  20. Hand Giga his death ray.
  21. Be target practice.
  22. Destroy anyone who makes a "Giga's bald!" joke.
  23. Initiate HQ's self-destruct mode.
  24. Add new equipment/features to HQ.
  25. Sharpen Dark's claws.
  26. Open the door to the Cult
  27. Kill Justin Bieber.
  28. Feed the cave people.
  29. Never leave any cultist behind.
  30. Let Fricai out of his cage
  31. Put Fricai in his cage
  32. Make pasta
  33. Put Zio in his cage
  34. Let Zio out of his cage
  35. Summon Broly
  36. Make bald jokes
  37. Explain something in a very smart way
  38. Explain something in a dumb way
  39. Whip Fang
  40. hail Kirby (>°.°)>
  41. say Yra zye hoe 'i
  42. Spite Hunch
  43. Cereal
  44. Slap people with random object.
  45. Hit Jason in the head
  46. Brick Giga
  47. Throw people inside Clown Room
  48. Ban people with ze Ban Stick
  49. Torment people(Ex. Starr) with GD. 40
  50. Retrieve random people from the forum to the chatroom
  51. If Jude's eyes are red, STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM
  52. Make "in <insert country/state/continent> jokes
  53. Blame Nate for glitches
  54. Take part in "Throw X at Y" contests
  55. Make "We heard you like X" jokes
  56. Say "ok" every 5 minutes to Jason
  57. Get Cipher to join CoU *currently in progress*
  58. Go to the Cave to get stuff
  59. Make references that are funny
  60. Put Yoda in his cage
  61. Let Yoda out of his cage
  62. Have random bursts of inteligence
  63. Correct spelling error in above GD
  64. Think everyone is Santa
  65. Prevent Ti-Fang from eating someone
  66. Attempt to prevent Dark climbing on the ceiling
  67. Let Dark climb on the ceiling
  68. Make people lose The Game
  69. Say Bow Chika Bow Wow.
  70. Never question the officers 8^D
  71. Get shot
  72. Break into Giga's lab
  73. Get thrown out of Giga's lab
  74. Watch Zephyr
  75. Throw Blaize in a room with tons of squirrels
  76. Feed Starr when she's in sky serpent form. Hobos preferred.
  77. Let Dark throw Zio through stuff when he's mad.
  78. Shoe George
  79. Get shoe'd by George
  80. Make George shoe Gaga or Giag
  81. Kill Kuro... again
  82. Clone Afti and Kam for... target practice
  83. Travel to Mantua for some ridiculous mission
  84. Notice that Shadow is pretending to not be present
  85. Confuse new initiates by not telling them why they have to choose a weapon
  86. Purple.
  87. YES.
  88. Ninja Jason
  89. zomg rain
  90. Deliver postcards from Mister Peanut
  91. Send Blaine back to Soviet Russia

92-99. To be translated from Gopher to English.

100. Initiate Plan Alpha Omega Chatzy.

101-9000. To be translated from Gopher to English

9001. OVER 9000!